i was thinking about something today, well make that several somethings... a. i would like to write a bk someday (what type i have no idea!) b. i think what pple want in life is peace. only thing is life is such a complicated, materialistic rat race that its often too easy to lose sight of what are the impt things in life. to me those things are : family, friends, living each day just because life is beautiful (incidentally that's one of my fav movies of all time =), slowing down and really taking a look at the world, be it wondering at how blue the sky is, how the trees flower and bloom, then fade and die and bloom all over again, star-gazing... simple things like that. but i think its unfortunate that most pple dont take the time to slow down & appreciate this world we live in.

on and off i think of anna. what i remember most and best abt her is her smile and laugh - the way her face literally lights up, the joy in her voice and twinkle in her eyes. i miss her... a lot. when i think of how life goes by so fast, how everyone's rushing ard nonstop, i think of her. i think of her and how she left us like that ... suddenly ... unexpectedly ... ...

the next memory i have of her or rather not exactly of her is at her funeral... crying ... feeling all alone, and left behind in the world. everyone else had someone to hug them, comfort them that day, i was alone.

the third memory that usually follows is the one of shock. never ever in my life before had i ever been so shocked, stunned into absolute disbelief and silence. i had just spoken to her that very morning... the girl my classmate and teacher who were talking abt couldn't possibly be her.... we were just planning another orientation-grp outing!! i cried for an entire week...

i missed her then, 3 1/2 yrs ago... i miss her now... and i will always miss her. this was something i chanced upon in a bkstore aft the cremation:

Slow Dance
Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask "How are you?"
Do you hear the reply?
When the day is done
Do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
Running through your head?
You'd better slow down
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

Ever told your child,
We'll do it tomorrow?
And in your haste,
Not see his sorrow?
Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
Cause you never had time
To call and say "Hi"?
You'd better slow down.
Don't dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift....
Thrown away.
Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.